It's time for Top Ten Tuesdays, a segment that will be anything but consistent. We all love memes. We all love the San Diego Padres. I have a feeling we all won't love these memes- in fact, it took me a long time to find 10 respectable ones and the ones at the top of this list aren't even that great. Here...we...go.
10.
An overused meme IMO and not too funny, although it would take the Monstars'
help to get the Padres 8 in a row this year.
9.
Philosoraptor is a classic meme but this installment falls short of lasting appeal.
Durr hurr they suck so funny right?
8.
Scumbag Steve with an unfriendly reminder that the Padres are the only team yet to pitch a no-hitter.
7.
Oh hey Adrian nice to see you. Why does your face look like this:
Hopefully the Dodgers end up in the DOGHOUSE at the end of the year. SO FUNNY
6.
Boromir may have a point on this one. Will the Padres break out the brooms this year?
Then again, Boromir was corrupted by the Ring so he is kinda dum.
5.
Dumb and Dumber is the greatest comedy ever written. I couldn't help but appreciate this.
What's their playoff probability at right now?
4.
Bad Luck Brian with another case of bad luck. Made the list also because of a strange resemblance to a fellow contributor to this blog...hmmmmmm.
3.
Another appearance by the Philosoraptor. He does present quite a quandary.
But the answer is: The Padres will lose. Remember when they lost 3 of 4 at home to the terrible Cubs in 2010 and then had to sweep The Giants to make it to the Playoffs and then it came down to the last game and the The Padres lost and the The Giants won the effing World Series. Yuuuuuuuuuuuup.
2.
I don't know why this made me laugh so much maybe it's because the home runs wouldn't count because he took PEDs. Or just because stats from a games against The Padres should have an asterisk. Players are probably like, "We get to face Marquis? And then Ross?!?! REJOICE!!"
1.
The Pitiful Padres.
This speaks for itself. It is the essence of The Padres, why we made this blog, why we love the team.
Whatever we write on this blog, know that we love this team and nothing will ever change that. But seriously people to need to make some better memes, are The Padres THAT bad that people get bored of making fun of them?
BAD:
1. Pitching in general. 3rd in MLB in walks with 39, 18th in K's, 27th ERA 5.29. This is a bad trend that needs to be fixed ASAP. No pitching, no wins, because the Padres do not have the offense to support it.
Actual picture of Edison Volquez
2. Team Batting Average: 8th to last with a .239 average. Without Denorfia, Kotsay and Hundley, the average would be in the dumpster.
3. Denorfia not starting every day. With Maybin hitting sub .100, he cannot justify getting any playing time. Meanwhile, Denorfia is hitting over .400 and plays a decent enough outfield to play the field every night.
4. Attendance: Opening Day sellout was awesome. After opening day, pathetic. In the low 20,000s for the other two Dodger RIVAL games and 21,000 on a Friday night with a promotion is awful. Get to the park people.
Fans consistently have been dressing as blue seats when they come to the game
5. The record. 2-8 is bad. Close games, but need wins.
6. Gyorko's walkup music. I know he went to school in West Virginia but...
7. Early inning offense/early inning pitching
8. Baserunning. Silly mistakes out there. For anyone who watched last nights game, refer to Will Venable getting picked off first by a right fielder.
9. Cameron Maybin. In a deep slump with no signs of getting out soon.
10. Fences, but only because they've benefited the other teams more so far. I am talking to you Juan Uribe.
GOOD:
1. Nick Hundley can hit! 11 XBH last year in 200+ ABs and already 6 in the first 10 games. I like what I am seeing.
2. Carlos Quentin lighting a fire. Sure, it may cost him 8 games and some cash, but getting the team pumped up in something needed.
3. Denorfia being very productive, near a .500 obp. As stated above.
4. Made games at least exciting to watch. Games are at least coming down to the late innings giving Padres a chance. Oh yeah, the brawl spiced things up a bit.
5. Chase Headley comes back soon. 1-3 in Lake Elsinore last night. Could maybe be back for Dodgers series.
6. Late inning offense. Getting some clutch hits late in the ball game to crawl back from early inning runs pitchers have been giving up.
7. Cabrera leading off and having long productive at bats. He is seeing a lot of pitches and getting on base. If his steals start coming back, he could be a legit (Padres) leadoff hitter.
Watch your nuts, Ellis.
8. Yonder's versatility. More hilarious than good. 1st, 2nd, 3rd, Closer. Wherever you need Yonder, he will be there.
9. Uhhhhhhh....
10. Are there actually 10 good things? The Pad Squad girls?
Maybe they can get a win tonight. Rock the Rockies.
The Top 10 Reasons to go to Petco Park: By Emmett "The Jet" Rodriguez
The Home Opener for our beloved Padres is tomorrow and I hope I'll be seeing some of your beautiful faces there! We will be taking on the Dodgers and as a Padre fan I hope that we will be triumphant over the team from across town. When you go to a game you always hope that your team will do well and will come out with a big win, but that's not the only reason we go to games. A big part of the game is the stadium itself. We also go because the atmosphere of the park presents multiple reasons that elevate the game to fresh and enjoyable heights as a fan. If you know me well enough you know that on occasion I like to talk about things I enjoy or don't enjoy so much, and place them in a "Top (insert number)" list. With that said, let's hop into my own personal top 10 list for why I go to Petco Park.
#10. The Food (and beer too)
Food is a staple of Baseball. Hotdogs, peanuts, cotton candy, cracker jacks, etc., are all part of the experience. There are certain parks where the food is so popular that it's named after the park or the team. For instance, the Dodger Dog is named after the Dodgers and is made from various dogs gathered by the Humane Society in L.A. or so I've heard. Anyway I put this at ten because the downside nowadays is that it's so expensive and because I'm no baller shot collar I can only afford so much. Still, food is key and if you can get all you can eat seats then you're in for a treat. Ohh yeah and beer too.
You can eat the seat too.
#9. Fan Gear
For any Fan it's always nice to be able to snag some gear while you're at the game so you can represent your team both at the games and at your adult softball league, but maybe that's just me. Really though, you can generally find a ton of stuff at the team store that can be hard to find elsewhere and although it can be expensive it's the real deal and getting it from the stadium makes it that much more special. A most excellent plus to add to this is the free gear you can get on selected days. Last time I checked free is as good as it gets, unless they were to pay me to take their stuff, I guess that would be cool too.
Gimme dat throwback!
#8. The Tony Gwynn Statue
There is a huge-ass statue of Tony Gwynn and it's rad. Enough said. Actually I have a little more to say. It's just really cool to see this awesome commemoration for not only in my opinion, the greatest Padre ever, but also one of the games greatest of all time.
Mr. Padre indeed.
#7. Big Screen/ Kiss Cam
It's always a challenge to get on that thing and it's always worth it. You basically have to act like a borderline mental institute patient to get on that thing. Most of the time it's people dancing or kids just going nuts. There's something about seeing yourself on that giant screen and knowing that pretty much everyone at the stadium can see you. I put kiss cam on here for one reason. Basically if you're on this thing with your significant other, then they want you to kiss. I want to sit next to a babe that is not my significant other and have the cameras go to us and we'd have to kiss. Or not, but I can dream.
I'd kiss David Beckham. Yolo.
#6. The Homerun Ball
One of the most prized and valuable objects in baseball is the homerun ball. I would only put a ball with a famous signature in front of this in terms of worth. You could go to every game in the season, and not ever be close to getting one. With a foul ball there is a better chance of getting one but the homerun ball puts the foul ball to shame. Escpecially when it's from the team you're rooting for and from a player that you like. Add the game ending walk-off homerun to that equation and....well, let's just say you have something special.
This might be worth a dollar or two.
#5. The Team
If you read my other article about what it means to be a fan then you know why this is important to me. This is your team, your home. These are the boys you go to see get the win and hopefully make it to the World Series. Seriously, go read that other article because I could go on forever with this one.
Ohh Yonder and Everth. Could they get much cuter? (Deno photo-bomb.)
#4. Dancing Groundskeeper
If you haven't seen this guy yet you're missing out. I don't know what it is about this but I get beyond stoked everytime this dude rolls out to second base. So, basically I think this is during the 7th inning stretch? I could be wrong but anyway a bunch of guys come out with these really nice, modern, rake-like sweeping tools to come and smooth down the dirt. If one of them has your generic old-school rake and starts heading towards second, get ready to be stoked. Out of nowhere the music starts bumpin' and this guy just starts getting down. Once he gets going the crowd follows suit. I've seen him dance with the rake before and sometimes without it so you never know what you're going to get with this guy. I haven't seen him in a while and I'm pretty bummed out but this is something that happens at Petco and I always hope I get to see it.
#3 The Pad Squad Girls
It was really hard for me to put this at number three and not number one but it's just as deserving. I've never seen a Pad Squad girl that wasn't beautiful. I guess I'm just a guy but everytime these girls roll out I get jealous of the guys on the Pad Squad.
Uhh, yes please.
#2. Friends
I go to games with my friends and I love them. This is a place we can all have fun together and just be stoked from beginning to end. There's not much else I need to say about this one. If you have friends and you like baseball, this is the place for you. Even if you don't like baseball this place is rad and you should come hang out.
This is how my friends make me feel.
AND FINALLY.....
NUMBER....
1.
The Thrill
Did you really think this guy wouldn't be my #1??? Please.
Now you may or may not agree with this list entirely and that's cool, we all have our differences and to tell you the truth this list is part truth/ part lulz but they are all actual reasons why I like to go to Padre games. I think when it get's down to the core of why going to games is fun, it's the whole package. They call baseball a pastime and even though I agree with that, it's also my present. It's something I love and going to a game is an an experience I think everyone should at least try once in their life. Bucket list that ish yo!
